Category Archives: OPINIONS

The Bargain Hunter’s Used Car Guide

OPINION

by Matt Benoit

Today, the Bargain Hunter, a “certified” (by which we mean he once spent time in a mental hospital) expert on both bargains and hunting, is here to help you find the used car of your dreams, and hopefully not your nightmares, by pointing you in the right direction. He will, not, however, loan you any cash.

So, it’s time for you to find a used car. The easiest way to go about finding a used car involves finding what are called “classified” ads, which are usually where desperate people go to sell things they don’t want anymore, including their own loved ones:

“In-laws—2 for 1 special! They said they were only staying two weeks, but they’re STILL here! $500 OBO, but willing to throw in Menudo album.”

Classified ads can be found in newspapers, but also on-line at Web sites such as Craigslist. On a side note, I have no idea who the hell Craig is, or what his list looks like.

Anyway, once you have found a car that you are interested in and it does not convey from its photograph that it was a stunt vehicle in Mad Max or is an otherwise heavily-oxidized death cage, it is time to meet the car and owner in-person.

You must now make an appointment to meet, hopefully in broad daylight. Consider bringing along someone who looks like Steven Seagal for “moral” support—just in case.

As a discerning consumer, it is always important to ask the owner questions about the vehicle. These should include at least some of the following:

1)     Does it run?

2)     Is the door supposed to fall off like that?

3)     Has this thing ever been in any high-speed chases?

4)     What are all these stains in the trunk?

5)     Can I paint over the “Pimpmobile” logo? 

Once you are satisfied with your responses, and the person who is answering them does not freak out and try to run away (you can always send Steven Seagal after them if they do), it is time to suggest taking the car for a “test drive.”

This is where you will get to “feel out” your potential wheels—none of which will hopefully shoot off the vehicle when you make that first right-hand turn into traffic—by driving the car around with the owner sitting shotgun.

It has been my experience that you should accelerate the vehicle to at least 100 mph to get an idea of its maneuvering capabilities, as well as properly testing the brakes by slamming on them as hard as possible.

If anything, these exercises should help you determine whether you really want to purchase the car, and may even help you persuade the owner to knock off a few bucks (especially if Steven Seagal, who is sitting in the backseat, has him or her in a head lock).

After this, if you are still confident about the vehicle, you may cut a deal and make your purchase. And even though the Bargain Hunter will not help you with gas money, he would love to know how your used car is treating you.

So drop him an e-mail sometime. By the way, that vomit green AMC Gremlin you have really matches your personality.


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WHATCOM VOICES

WHAT RESOURCE WOULD YOU LIKE TO SEE ON CAMPUS THAT’S NOT ALREADY HERE?

Courtney Addler

 

Courtney Adler

“We need more places to hang out.”

 

 

Nathan Barton

 

Nathan Barton

“A larger library, comparable to Western’s.”

 

 

Derek VanderGriend

 

Derek vandergriend

“I think we need more bike racks.”

 

 

Ian Campbell

 

Ian Campbell

“More computers, because I find  myself standing in line quite a lot.”


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Reflections on LaRouche

OPINION

By Emily Huntington

As a journalist representing the Horizon, and therefore representing the college, the biggest part of my job is to stay objective. In other words, my opinions have to stay out of my writing and my interviews.

It gets difficult, because I have a lot of opinions. When there are demonstrations on campus that display huge signs against abortion, I want to speak up. When the LaRouche men came with the Obama/Hitler mustache poster on October 28, I was angry…but all I could do was shake my head as I walked past them. That was until about 1:30, when myself and a classmate decided to take our notepads down and talk to them. Not to do a story, but just to see why they were there and what they had to say.DSC_0879

The first thing they said to us was “Hey, did you see our poster?” Now, what I responded probably could have gone unsaid, but I feel that doing something like that to the president of the United States – whether you love him or hate him – is unacceptable. Besides, I find it ironic that one of the men looked like a carbon copy of a younger version of him! After I said what I said and they realized that we were with the paper, they wouldn’t talk to us. “We don’t give interviews,” one of the men said. He also said that because I “insulted” his friend they weren’t going to talk… had we been “normal” people (not student journalists), they would have answered our questions.  Since we weren’t, however, all they did was hand us a magazine with a number on the back. “Call this number if you want an interview,” he said. They were downright rude.

Unfortunately, no matter how offensive or rude some demonstrators are, the college cannot disallow them to come to campus. There is a form they have to fill out and they can only be on certain areas, but as long as they are keeping their hands to themselves and not following students with propaganda, they can be there. No matter what kind of demonstrations come, whether it be anti-abortion posters, or if the LaRouche men come back, I have to keep my cool and refrain from saying what is really on my mind, even if they return with the same poster or something more offensive.


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